empty shell, everything is empty i dun know why but it seems that i can't trust anyone anymore
and it's becoming from bad to worst .. T.T i think i have hurt my game cpl alot alot ... the things i said .. the reaction i gave is so so wrong .. sigh ..

Things are happening, job interview for ck tang and prime supermarket. I dun know how will it goes for one thing sure i dun want to get stuck in this job anymore.

well that's all i can say for now, no mood to blog

emo

i am still feeling very emo .. head feel so hurts going to burst soon .. i think i am on the verge of falling into depression .. this time i dun know how long it will take to heal ... just hope .. hope that i will start to forget everything .. everything was just a beautiful dream .. trying very hard to put down the dream end on a alarm clock the dream shatters .. i hope i can delete it away. ^.^ trying very hard to recover soon. Even if i diE today .. i would be more than happy to die xD

sad ~

hi hi i am feeling emo again, why is this kinda thing happening to me? I gave another try in relationships and it failed again... i think it's because i sux too much ,, or perhaps i am not good enough ... my heart is breaking apart again .. i am really really very tired ... i dun know why i just can't stop sobbing .. maybe someday .. some day i will really get over him .. i really dunnoe to know someone is hard to forget some one is even harder .. i realised it 3 yrs ago but i can't stop myself sinking in to another shit ... why is shit always happening ? it hurts so bad .. for a long time i haven't been crying so hard until my head is so pain. Yesterday i didn't sleep well, today is even worst.. i got the worst news .. everything turns out according to the temple's charm ..
better dun go into relationship.. freedom is the best .. ouch .. it really hurtz the sky just split and it fall on me i feel as if i am becoming roti prata .. i am so flaten .. from today onwards ..
I swear i will never never never want to try relationship ever again. I think i will get super drunk on saturday bah .. i dun want to think anymore .. i am so drained why it ended up this way? I dun think we even started .. i am just so foolish to thnk that is going to work.

My tears are bitter .. and my heart is dying ..

spoiled day

I went to visit Man Li after the visit to the SGH, after that i went down to Bishan today and later to takashimaya and finally bugis supposed to be a pefect day~ i actually found ayumi's dome tour disc 2001 i was suppose to be happy, it juz dun sell anymore in the market.

Why is my day spoiled ? i told Meow that i can't take the honey anymore because the honey makes me sick it is very heaty, she asked me how much honey did i took i told her that i took half of table spoon and she was like screaming table spoon and tea spoon difference and i told her
table spoon is juz like soup spoon whereas tea spoon is those we stir coffee spoons. later on while we were having dinner at the hawker centre, we talk abt tea spoon and table spoon again she was yelling at me in front of the table i was like .. wtf nid u be so fierce?

while she was walking towards the bugis street i asked her why are we here, she was like talking in a pissed manner i thought i told u that i wanted to buy shoes. Nvm i followed her behind trying to catch up and she juz turned and said i dun want to go liao and she just stormed off
walk away without waiting for me.

wtf did i do wrong this time ? every time when she needs me i am there for her when everytime when i nid her where is she ? i am feeling very sad today ~ EMO~
can some one pls juz kill me ?

my one and only best friend is turning her back against me ~ walking away more and more from me i couldn't see her face anymore ~ and as i turn and walk i feel pain in my heart ~ a pain that is undescribable i am lonely most of the time now i have to learn to deal wif it how to be solo for the rest of my life ~ can God pls gimme strength to carry on the things i am doing everyday? i dun want to be solo anymore.

sigh

yesterday my manager came and approach me ask me if i was intrested to go to another outlet
to become supervisor.. i rejected the offer coz tat outlet is not as ez as ppl think more politics than any other outlets and there goes my chance well i never regret this time
once bitten twice shy i was beaten once by my crazy supervisor i dun think i will try again
^^ life is unpreditable ~

Rotting away!

oh yeah!

tmd finally able to upload the song and play in this blogger , find tat it's kinda suxs esp the iweb music zZz super slow. Any way i am super bz always sigh as usual i dun have much time, work work work... wth~ sometimes i juz feel so empty and sad i dun know why or what happen ~

haix .. something is wrong wif me again .. looking for certain things in life but yet can't fulfill it
i am a faliure ...

Sad life

i am asking myself why am i existing in this world? why is it tat i am doing the same one damn fucking thing every day ? I hate myself ~ why ? if i only can turn back time i wouldn't make the same old fucking mistake again. I wouldn't even allow my parents to make the papers to allow this change. How naive i was at that time, i thought things will be the same but i was wrong. First 2 yrs things were the same but as times goes by every thing went chaotic, my things went missing in the house almost everyday. I hate myself for this terrible mistake tat i made and i regret it very much, i am going crazy sooner or later in my mind there is only one thing to do
throw away every thing in my possesion including cds and cosmetic. I am sick of things getting missing and i wish i can die at this minute. God if u can read this msg, i hope u end my life now bring me to hell i dun wish to live on any more i got no more strength, why are u doing this to me to torture me every single day?

Depression

I am having depression again ~ ppl around me i just didn't feel tat they care abt me, yesterday when i ask my friend abt cash item she is like practically can't be bothered attitude towards me
i feel super sad. I really don't understand why is it tat when ppl needs me i will always be wif them but when i need them where are they? none of them is around i feel so disappointed and even times i have to do my shopping solo ~ i have never been so lonely before every thing is so solo. Even in game today my cyber friend ignore me , what's wrong wif me ? am i tat annoying ?
EMO loh. friends come and goes pass me none have stay wif me through from young till now i am finding my life is becoming from bad to worst there isn't any more meaning to live for life is all about doing the job you hate, getting sick, getting paid, sleep and u wake up face the same thing again over and over again. Sometimes i juz wish i could get sick and die in bed during my sleep i am so sick of my life i mean look at other ppl's life those who went through same sch wif me what jobs are they holding now ? some are uni grats some went to work in bank some work in the office but what the hell am i ? i am just a stupid dumb cashier in some dumb fucking company facing some fucking managers and superiors that dun even fancy me for a higher lvl position. wat am i? i am juz a regular super sucker tat sucks the air can't do any shit for good.

I am really sick of my life can somebody help me ?