rebellious me

hi hi everyone ! seems to be like this blog is dead muwahahaa damn bz don't even have time to keep track up date wth is going on ~

Early in the morning , while i was in msn chatting and disturbing Ryu manager rang me
" Who is the singer of Umbrella?" i answered "rihanna" " oh are u sure u are gona sing that song? it's very hard can u manage the song a not?" <---- this phase really pissed me off
pls do not doubt me when i said certain things i will do it than let me do it instead of doubting my ability of perform. -.- anyway i know she hates me , i hate her to the core too. Used to be able to talk to her but no longer able to talk to her anymore because i know that this person cannot be trusted she will stab u from front back side and butt stab u all the way in until u die. She is those kinda person who will care only if u have the useable VALUE in her eyes, if u are a junkie like me she will just trash u aside. alright since she behaves and give me shit i will leave this company no matter what after chinese new year. By the time it is at March i should be able to finish notice and go to work in another company.

For the time being now i will concentrate on the Umbrella song show her that i can perform things like that it's just that she shove me away and for that stupid area manager, pls there is really this song name umbrella if she have never heard it pls google it and stop telling me that i lie to her.

I am rebelling against the whole world now , this place is not for me to stay . . . . . ..

haiz

It seems that ppl are always forgetting me, alright i suck. No matter wtf i did was wrong, always give ppl the wrong impression. Nobody's best friend, ppl would only think abt me when they need to do things other than that. If i die that is my problem I am feeling depressed lately seems to be like no matter how i try to change things will never change it would always repeat again and again.

sometimes and many times i just feel like just jump down a building or something end this shity life
i feel so alone most of the time. Why ? because i am invisible ? because i am a loner ? i don't know.
often i would be left aside. I feel so stress during work i feel even stress when i am outside i really really do not know wth i should do anymore.

Walking to the road of darkness again, i wonder how long will i be able to get the shit of of it.
is there something wrong with me? or am i just too weird ? maybe it's because i am just too fat
i really really don't know perhaps a curse was place on me and i am so unpopular ? ppl just find me boring after a while ? i really don't know .

Preparing to rot tml again. *rotting in process*

my life, my story .. boring.

Went down to acer service centre early in the morning as early as 9 am plus woot it is so huge. lol . well i manage to find my way there .. guess what happen to my letter "u" ? since yesterday till now i also dunnoe wtf happen a piece of stupid glue is stucked to the "u" key LOL -.- eeeeee why like that neh ? i also no idea .. i m so bored and depressed .. after my thing is done i went over to daiso. i bought alot of crap.some are useless crap eye lashes la.. things like that .. lol i even bought nail glue for lin dot. xD i think if i ever die ... lol only my best friend and lin dot would be sad .. ^,^ ppl come and go ..i dun know why is it that there are so many nasty ppl keep commenting abt me and my size, no one likes to be big bone and no one likes to be big size. This phase keep gripping on my heart... "ur figure is not like miss "A" it keep haunting over and over me.. wth .. i just feel damn hurtwhy must that guy gimme this kinda nasty comment no one knows as far as i know after 28/2/09 i won't want to go out with him again anymore .. because i dun wana face him. On the 28 i am planning to check into hotel with lin.staying over night from there .. God i am really feeling depressed, do u know i cried and cried at night to sleep.i just pray if there is a next life ... pls PLS make me look prettier and with a super model figure. I am really sickand tired of being looked down and cast aside .. WHY must this always happen to me? seems to be like there is no one on this world knows how am i feeling. everyone is bz. bzbzbzbz working dating etc etc .. best friend had a bf bz with bf . i dun think she will have time for me other than that she is gaming if she calls me she would just ask mesomethings over the phone that's all.
went to visit man li today.. i miss man li alot i dun know when i will be able to meet the rest of the gang member againlol gang member... nah i am refering to shamimi and pei shi ... the last time we saw each other was 4 yrs ago ?omg time really fly xD ... and i am so damn bored.Bored ! why isn't man li here neh ? :P in this point of timei still have alot of doubts in my mind .. will i be able to go for the diploma course ? how long will i be able to stay in the job ? finally when the hell will i slim down ? i really got no idea . . . i wish i wish and i wish .. i can turn back time when i can choose my ancestors. to be smaller built.. -.- things like that.
ROAR ! i really hate myself, what is it that ppl keep telling me to love myself? i really got no idea what is that isn't love somebody just love? so much things to consider ? i really dunnoe..

" ur figure is not like miss A"

this phase really pierce my heart, i know i dun have a figure. my figure is round. oval fine what ever u name that. this really sucks even if u dun like that person u dun have the right to tell her this. I swear if i have alot alot of money, i will go for liposuction. Things are already bad enough, when u try to do things and it dun work out pouring oil over fire yes i know i am fat very fat dun compare me to other ppl because i am unique.

i hate u !

my world is filled with hate, i hate my supervisor. While i was talking on the phone and i answered i "dunnoe" she react like a tiger jumping over a rabbit pounce at me screaming at me infront of customer and even pushed me. I didn't know about the promotion thing, another work mate call me from another outlet and she just do this to me. wtf .

come on why must u do this to me? she didn't wana communicate with me, ask her things 2 things can happen either 1. she dun answer u, 2. she gives u a black face and frown at u.
if she is the lady boss i won't even bother to work for her.

Grrrr i hate my supervisor she likes to demotivate ppl, she wants to get me out of this job and most of all she likes to pull ppl down. ever see her encourage anyone? no. She is inefficient, incompletant and illeterate. I HATE HER ~